All I ever needed to know about human nature, I learned from riding my bike


The rules of human perception seem to be as follows:

Perception of Cyclists:

While I am riding, if you are slower, a pedestrian, a child, a pet, or a badly maintained road, you are an impediment to the freedom and purity that is cycling and a total waste of space and/or oxygen.

Perception of Vehicle Drivers:

While I am driving, if you are smaller; slower; a cyclist; a deer; squirrel, or raccoon; or any other animate or inanimate object, you are an impediment to the entitlement of all like me who choose to display their detachment from reality by bludgeoning into a salsa-like pulp said impediments in much the same way a rampaging Hun on cocaine with a one-ton-plus steel projectile would.

Perception of Pedestrians:

What? There are other objects in the universe that move at a greater velocity than me as I casually stroll into your path? You must be kidding.

At least, this is what I perceive on my bike commute to work.

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All content copyright unless otherwise specified © 2008-2013 by Tammy Salyer, writer. All rights reserved. Permission is granted to use short quotes provided proper attribution is given.